E and I have been together for three and a half years now, and, to be honest, it’s been three and a half years of waiting.
Anyone in a long-distance relationship must, by definition, be good at deferred gratification. In relationships where you live in different places – especially different countries – you have to be good at waiting for things. Waiting for his/her next visit. Waiting for your next trip. Waiting for visas. Waiting for entry bans to be over (or maybe that’s just me?). Waiting in arrivals, butterflies in your stomach. Waiting in departures, with tears running down your face. All the highs tempered by the lows of endless, lonely waiting. Waiting for the waiting to be over.
But what happens when it is over? When what you’ve been waiting for comes to pass, and you realise that you can raise your eyes from the ground and start thinking and planning for the future that has – finally – arrived?
I haven’t blogged in a while because – magically – our waiting is finally over. After months of umming and ahhing, of possibilities and inklings of opportunities, I’ve finally started a new job in Istanbul, setting up the Turkey office of the NGO I work for.
And so, with job offer in hand, I have finally and officially relocated to Istanbul. Pop the champagne corks. The waiting is over.
You see, this may seem odd (or selfish) to some of you, but the final holdup has been me securing a job in Turkey. I’ve never felt comfortable about the prospect of quitting my job to move to Turkey. I love what I do, and – for better or worse – it’s a big part of who I am. I’ve always known that quitting would put pressure on our relationship that would not be entirely healthy.
And so here we are. What comes next is a blank page. We’re both still slightly reeling from the surprise, but our eyes are on the skies now, and the view looks good.